You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
