dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
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