Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
