Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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