"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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