Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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