we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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