so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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