it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
