Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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