We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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