Texts From Last Night

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  (940): View more from Texas

  she started talking about my kids

  (1-940): View more from Texas

  was she topless?

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  (940): she started talking about my kids (1-940): was she topless? http://tfl.nu/rvo3
  Replies (14) Good night (651) Bad night (1710) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.

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  (760): If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best. http://tfl.nu/ew7r
  Replies (17) Good night (3998) Bad night (654) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.

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  (317): Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am. http://tfl.nu/ygwv
  Replies (11) Good night (843) Bad night (5313) Order T-Shirt
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.

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  (224): finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know. http://tfl.nu/xu8i
  Replies (39) Good night (6667) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.

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  (205): We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor. http://tfl.nu/xv4s
  Replies (12) Good night (1018) Bad night (4860)
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  (805): View more from California

  my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.

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  (805): my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad. http://tfl.nu/fiwi
  Replies (43) Good night (1291) Bad night (14177) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.

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  (732): I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN. http://tfl.nu/e3sn
  Replies (18) Good night (7241) Bad night (840) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'

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  (804): i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better' http://tfl.nu/bjkh
  Replies (4) Good night (1793) Bad night (749) Order T-Shirt
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  (469): View more from Texas

  Tornado booty call.. dedication

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  (469): Tornado booty call.. dedication http://tfl.nu/xoaj
  Replies (6) Good night (899) Bad night (554) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again

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  (978): No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again http://tfl.nu/wayk
  Replies (1) Good night (784) Bad night (358) Order T-Shirt
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.

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  (702): Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism. http://tfl.nu/d72k
  Replies (1) Good night (1524) Bad night (344) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus

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  (215): I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus http://tfl.nu/7gt9
  Replies (5) Good night (1177) Bad night (435) Order T-Shirt
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.

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  (514): so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view. http://tfl.nu/r0p2
  Replies (2) Good night (1448) Bad night (365) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me

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  (443): She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me http://tfl.nu/42gf
  Replies (3) Good night (1039) Bad night (459)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."

  (1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?

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  (780): In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared." (1-780): Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout? http://tfl.nu/ziqx
  Replies (2) Good night (698) Bad night (178) Order T-Shirt

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