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she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Tornado booty call.. dedication
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
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