Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I came so hard my ears popped.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
