wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize