Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
