Can Purell be used as lube?
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
