We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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