Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
