ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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