i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
