Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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