His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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