But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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