Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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