Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize