Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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