I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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