I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
