; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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