I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
40s are totally the cure
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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