she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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