stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
