she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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