if i can run in heels then i can drive
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize