I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
