let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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