Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
