"it" just moved
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
my being single is dangerous.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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