walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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