my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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