I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
