Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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