I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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