i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Couch. On fire.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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