Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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