It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
