Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
