My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize