i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
