their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
