i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
